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Chinese Woman Demands “Hugging Fee” After Calling Off Wedding, Sparks Online Debate

10/14/2025
in Blog
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A woman in central China has gone viral on social media after refusing to return part of her ex-fiancé’s betrothal gift—insisting she should keep ​30,000 yuan (US$4,200)​​ as compensation for “hugging” during their pre-wedding photoshoot.

According to ​Henan TV (via the South China Morning Post)​, the couple, both from ​Pingdingshan, Henan Province, got engaged in ​January​ and planned to marry in ​November. Following local tradition, the groom’s family gave the bride’s family a ​200,000 yuan (US$28,000) betrothal gift—a customary gesture of goodwill before marriage.

However, the woman ​suddenly canceled the wedding, claiming the man was ​​”too honest” and earned too little. While she agreed to return most of the betrothal money, she demanded to keep ​30,000 yuan, citing:

  • A ​​”hugging fee”​​ (reportedly referring to a posed photo with the groom).
  • ​​”Expenses incurred while hanging out together.”​​

The matchmaker, ​Ms. Wan, who introduced the couple, called the demand ​​”immoral”​, noting she had never seen such a request in her ​10-year career. She clarified that the “hug” was merely a ​photo pose​ requested by the photographer.

After negotiations, the two families settled on the woman returning ​170,500 yuan (US$24,000)​—meaning she kept ​29,500 yuan​ (close to her original 30,000 yuan demand).

​Cultural Context: The Pressure of Betrothal Gifts​

In China, betrothal gifts (often ​100,000–500,000 yuan / US$14,000–70,000) are a ​longstanding tradition, but they increasingly place ​financial strain​ on grooms’ families—especially in rural areas, where a ​gender imbalance​ makes finding brides more difficult.

This isn’t the first dispute over such gifts: Last year, a man in ​Hunan Province​ sued his ex-fiancée and her father for refusing to return ​230,000 yuan (US$32,000)​. Though a court ordered repayment within ​15 days, the family ignored it, leading the man to seek media help.

The case has sparked ​widespread discussion online, with many questioning the woman’s justification for keeping part of the money.

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