A woman in central China has gone viral on social media after refusing to return part of her ex-fiancé’s betrothal gift—insisting she should keep 30,000 yuan (US$4,200) as compensation for “hugging” during their pre-wedding photoshoot.
According to Henan TV (via the South China Morning Post), the couple, both from Pingdingshan, Henan Province, got engaged in January and planned to marry in November. Following local tradition, the groom’s family gave the bride’s family a 200,000 yuan (US$28,000) betrothal gift—a customary gesture of goodwill before marriage.
However, the woman suddenly canceled the wedding, claiming the man was ”too honest” and earned too little. While she agreed to return most of the betrothal money, she demanded to keep 30,000 yuan, citing:
- A ”hugging fee” (reportedly referring to a posed photo with the groom).
- ”Expenses incurred while hanging out together.”
The matchmaker, Ms. Wan, who introduced the couple, called the demand ”immoral”, noting she had never seen such a request in her 10-year career. She clarified that the “hug” was merely a photo pose requested by the photographer.
After negotiations, the two families settled on the woman returning 170,500 yuan (US$24,000)—meaning she kept 29,500 yuan (close to her original 30,000 yuan demand).
Cultural Context: The Pressure of Betrothal Gifts
In China, betrothal gifts (often 100,000–500,000 yuan / US$14,000–70,000) are a longstanding tradition, but they increasingly place financial strain on grooms’ families—especially in rural areas, where a gender imbalance makes finding brides more difficult.
This isn’t the first dispute over such gifts: Last year, a man in Hunan Province sued his ex-fiancée and her father for refusing to return 230,000 yuan (US$32,000). Though a court ordered repayment within 15 days, the family ignored it, leading the man to seek media help.
The case has sparked widespread discussion online, with many questioning the woman’s justification for keeping part of the money.